Last we discussed Napoleon, I had made him pancakes for National Pancake Day and he had made me corned beef and cabbage for St. Patrick’s Day. Then we discussed taking a little driving weekend trip together and I had begun to plan our weekend.
As the weekend in question drew closer I found myself wavering between excitement and worry. On the one hand, I was about to spend a full weekend with a boy I liked being around doing the kinds of things I love to do: seeing friends, exploring a new (to me) city, going to museums and zoos, eating local food, and drinking local beer. On the other hand, I’d known this guy about 2 months and – while we wouldn’t be alone all weekend – we hardly knew each other. We hadn’t even done anything other than make out a couple days a week and here I was going away with him. Mind you, I was going either way, but the plan was for him to come with.
About 5 days before our planned (by me) weekend, I realized I hadn’t yet gotten confirmation from him about what day he could leave, what he wanted to do while we were away… really anything at all. I had him over for dinner and drinks that night and found a way to innocuously ask him about this whole thing.
Me: Do you want a mushroom glaze or a Gorgonzola glaze on your steak?
Napoleon: Mushrooms? That sounds awesome. That.
Me: Okay. Are you still coming up with me this weekend?
Napoleon: I don’t think I can. I have a lot going on at home and with my family.
Napoleon: Don’t be mad. You’re mad aren’t you?
Me: Mad is not the word I’d use. Maybe annoyed. Frustrated.
Napoleon: That’s not fair. I have things I need to do here.
Me: It’s perfectly fair. It’s 5 days out. I don’t want to drive it myself, at this point plane tickets are too expensive, and everyone else I know who is going is all carpooled up. I’m annoyed because you couldn’t tell me earlier. Or you didn’t want to. But either way, you were selfish and didn’t think of how it’d change my plans…hell, you weren’t even going to tell me. I had to ASK.
Napoleon: I would have told you. I was trying to not make you upset.
Me: Well you can’t MAKE me upset, but I am annoyed. So, super job.
He spent a lot of the night apologizing while I tried to move on and not be mad at him. We ate our dinner, watched a movie and made out a little before I told him I had to be up early and that he should probably get going.
Two days later he came over on last minute plans because he wanted to see me/make it up to me that he was bailing on our trip. While we hung out on the couch and made out, he asked me if – when I got back, maybe a few weeks later – I would go to Key West with him for a little get away.
How could I be upset at someone who was trying to make it up to me so quickly? I couldn’t. So I agreed. We started talking about weekends, but quickly went back to making out and snuggling on the couch. This is when he started awkwardly caressing my knee cap.
Me: Why do you always do that?
Napoleon: Do what?
Me: Like, draw circles or something with your fingers when you’re touching me. It’s like your fidgety. Are you anxious or fidgety?
Napoleon: Oh. I don’t know. I’m sorry?
Me: It’s just weird to me. It feels awkward. I can’t explain it.
Napoleon: I mean, if you don’t want me to touch you… [as he moves to the other edge of the couch and as far from me as possible]
Me: That’s not what I meant. Can’t we just like, hold hands or cuddle without being fidgety?
Napoleon: I’m not fidgety. I just like to express myself by touching people.
Me: I’m not sure I’m in that same boat…
Okay, so by now you’ve all figured out that I’m not particularly touchy-feely. Between The Bachelor and now Napoleon, but I think it really depends on the person. I was VERY touchy feely with The Mayor. So who knows. Maybe there’s some clear and evident truth about how I really felt about each person…
Two days after that, I went on our trip… alone. I had a BEAST of a good time with my friends – especially the couple who knew he was supposed to join me and wanted me to forget all about him – exploring a new city.
While I was gone, Napoleon made sure to text and keep in touch with me. He told me he missed hanging out with me and really wished he had come with after all. He was having a crappy time at home and in hindsight made the wrong choice. He was “really looking forward” to our future trip to Key West when he promised to make it up to me.
Little did I know what he was REALLY up to that weekend.
Come back next Monday to find out about the night when I dropped some premium grade psychology on him and found out how our story would end.